Listening a Person into Life: Reflective Listening

Video 12

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In reflective listening we act as a mirror for the other person, helping her to uncover what is really in her heart. Explore the power of reflective listening in the process of accompaniment.

Scripture for Reflection

“The purpose in a man’s mind is like deep water, but a man of understanding will draw it out.” (Proverbs 20:5)

“If one gives answer before he hears, it is his folly and shame.” (Proverbs 18:13)

“So whatever you wish that men would do to you, do so to them; for this is the law and the prophets.” (Matthew 7:12)

“He who has an ear, let him hear what the Spirit says to the churches.” (Revelation 3:22)

Reflection Questions

  1. Was there a word, phrase, or idea that resonated with me? That was new to me?
  2. Sister Amata Filia says that we don’t always need to solve a problem or have an action step at the end of a conversation. Some conversations may just be about venting – a time that gives a person a sense that she isn’t alone. Who do I turn to when I need to vent? How does venting to that person make me feel? 
  3. How do you typically respond when you’re facing a big problem or challenge? Are there any techniques you’ve found helpful in resolving major life obstacles or challenges? Think about an experience in which a conversation with another person helped you discover and articulate your own thoughts and feelings. How did this experience help you understand yourself more deeply? How did it help you understand the situation and help you move forward? How exactly did that happen in the course of the conversation?
  4. What listening skill(s) do I want to focus on in my daily conversations with others?
  5. What areas of authentic listening can I work on in my own prayer life – my dialogue with God?
  6. Take a moment to pray again the prayer from the end of the video:

Thank you, Lord, for the gift of our capacity to listen. 

Thank you for the gift of being heard and understood, by others, and by you.

Help us to give the gift of ourselves in really listening to others, to reverence them and communicate to them your love and their infinite worth.

Help us to train the ears of our heart by listening to you in prayer, by steeping ourselves in your love for us so that we can give that same love to every soul we encounter. 


  1. Is there a fruit from my prayer that I would like to share with others? 

Discussion Questions

  1. Is there a fruit from your prayer that you would like to share with others?
  2. Sister Gianna Marie clarifies that reflecting is low risk because if we are wrong, the other person will likely correct us. How might this understanding of reflective listening give you the freedom to listen authentically?
  3. Why is it so important to withhold judgment and act as a mirror for the other person?
  4. How have these videos on listening inspired you to listen to others in a new way?


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    12 - Active

    Listening a Person into Life: Reflective Listening

    In reflective listening we act as a mirror for the other person, helping her to uncover what is really in her heart. Explore the power of reflective listening in the process of accompaniment.